Always with the questions *

I took a test online, I really do very poorly on 3 sections and it has given me some bad scores. Not that I was all that discontent with a 74.77%. I worked out today, I should keep a running tab so I know how good or bad I am about doing it. I'm supposed to do them daily, I think I'm managing maybe 3 - 4 times a week max right now. I really need to get better about it. * One

I think it's time for another round of answering questions. I keep getting lectures about my decisions and this one was about my feelings on the wars we are currently in. I'm not sure how to go about this subject. Most people get highly offended when I tell my opinions on it since I don't really believe in the wars we are in. Years worth of time, billions of dollars spent, lives wasted, families destroyed and for what? There hasn't been any real markers of this being successful or ending any time soon. How exactly does one fight a war on terror? Terror is an emotion we either ignore or indulge in. Other people just know how to play on the fears we hold close to and it is we ourselves who let it rule over us. That having been said, I still wish to join, and it is in this that everyone brings up the question of why, but since I have covered that what most people seem to ask now is how.

How can I wish to join when I don't believe in what the military is doing right now. The answer to that is simple. I'm not joining because I wish to fight for some ridiculously hazy concept but because I want to be in the military. I will do my duty, to the best of my ability. When I am told to go, I will go. I won't have complaints in this, I know that joining now means it will be part of my term of service. I will end up overseas. I will do what I was trained to do. That doesn't mean I have to agree to why we are there. The military is a way of life, one I have have been entrenched since birth and yet no experience is ever exactly the same. Being a dependent is far different then being a soldier, it is something I feel I need to do. It is something I want to do. If I wait any longer I will lose my chance all together. I don't want that to happen. Maybe some part of me secretly holds onto some notion of patriotism, I have no idea. I don't think so though. All I want, is to look back on this time and go "I was a soldier, proud to do my duty, honoring the desire to be a part of this group of people who stand up". I don't believe that has anything to do with where you are stationed as a soldier, so much as just being a soldier. I could be stationed state side my entire military career, I would still be happy. Being trained to fight doesn't mean one looks forward to doing so. The wisest fighter is one that knows when to fight and when to back down. I'm not going in so I can go guns blazing into the sandbox. I'm going in because I will be proud to wear the uniform.